Children of Divorce: The Sad Truth

With the divorce rate in the United States at 40%, hundreds of thousands, if not millions of children are affected by the decision of their parents to end their marriage. Over several decades, much research has been performed in the area of children of divorce. Unfortunately, much of this research shows the negative impact divorce has on these children. It cannot be disputed that in some circumstances, such as physical, emotional or sexual abuse of either the spouse or child, that it would be in the child’s best interest for his parents to divorce. However, it is estimated that only 30% of marriages end under these circumstances.

The children of divorce have been shown to suffer many negative effects that stem from their parent’s decision to end their marriage. Listed below, are just a few examples of what years of research has shown to be the effects on the children of divorce.

Teen suicide can occur for various reasons; however, the single best indicator is divorce and living in a single parent home.
College attendance is 60% lower for children of divorce than those of intact families.
Children of divorce have lower rates of graduation from high school and college.
There is a higher incidence of depression in children of divorce.
After a divorce, children tend to be more emotionally distant from both parents.
Children of divorce drop out of school at twice the rate as those from intact homes.
The fear of being rejected by their peers is twice as likely to occur among adolescents whose parents are divorced.
Children of divorce perform more poorly in ratings by parents and teachers on peer relationships, anxiety, withdrawal, aggression and hostility toward adults as those children from intact families.

Help For Children of Divorce

It is no secret that marriage takes work. Most marriages are salvageable when both parties make a concentrated effort to iron out their differences. If children resulted from the union, then this should be an additional incentive to stay in the marriage if at all possible. Open communication, marriage counseling, and taking time to reconnect, are just some of the avenues that can be explored to make the marital relationship mutually satisfying.

If a divorce is inevitable or has already occurred, than it is important to ease the children of divorce through the transition to a single-family home. If possible, both parents should remain involved in their children’s lives and be aware of the possible effects that divorce might have on the children. Working together, both parents can help to ensure the long term well-being of their children.