Monday 26 April 2010

Celebrate Good Times: Divorce Parties

Parties are an opportunity for people to gather together to celebrate special events or circumstances in their lives. Some of those special events could include birthdays, anniversaries, promotions, weddings, etc.

Generally, when people think of a party they think in terms of celebrating events that indicate good news. However, parties that are becoming increasingly popular are divorce parties. The popularity of divorce parties is based on the concept of divorce parties, the benefits that these gatherings provide and the ideas that can be utilized in throwing a divorce party.

What Are Divorce Parties?

Divorce parties are gatherings of friends who wish to support an individual who is going through or has gone through a divorce. Generally these parties are festive in nature and are designed to celebrate freedom, support divorcing friends and help in the healing and recovery process.

Often, these parties include music and are held in an exciting environment. In addition, there is usually plenty of appropriate food and drink. Also, divorce parties can take on a thematic approach. These themes surround the divorcing individual’s personal tastes, divorce theme, new circumstances, etc.

Benefits Of Divorce Parties

There are many benefits that are associated with being involved in a divorce party or hosting a divorce party. One of the major benefits of divorce parties is the support that is given to the divorcing individual. Often an individual who is going through a divorce may run the gamut emotionally. By hosting or attending a divorce party you are saying to that individual that you care and that you are there to support them.

In addition, divorce parties allow for the separated individual to use this experience as a cleansing opportunity. Often, individuals who may experience a tragic circumstance hold on to their emotions and don’t give expression to what they are feeling. Divorce parties can be that the venue where those feelings can be vented.

Also, divorce parties do not need it to be held on the day when the divorce becomes final. The divorce celebration can be held weeks or months later and can be an opportunity to meet new acquaintances.

Ideas For Divorce Parties

There are many creative themes or ideas that can be used for divorce parties. Some of those ideas can include an independence theme which can reflect the freedom that the individual will now enjoy because of the divorce. Examples of decorations could include balls being separated from chains or famous days on the calendar associated with independence.

An additional idea could be a cruise. This cruise could be labeled as a getaway cruise which could both figuratively and literally represent the getting away from a bad relationship.

One additional idea could include a masquerade party. The masquerade party could incorporate a theme such as a prison break. Some of the masquerade party costumes could be convict uniforms, prisoner guards, dressing up as a pardon or parole document, etc.

Sunday 25 April 2010

Planning a Divorce Party

For Katie (name changed to protect her identity), it was the final straw. After a series of affairs and more fights than she could count, her husband was now grinning at her as he revealed he'd brought a suitcase full of marijuana to sell on their family vacation. Katie yelled at her spouse, "Are you crazy? If we'd been caught, we both would have gone to jail. The state would have taken our children away, you stupid freak!"

With that, she filed for divorce. As the countdown to the final divorce decree began, Katie's friends gathered round to support her. But it wasn't quite the right kind of support. While her friends acted like she should be in mourning, Katie felt she'd finally made a wonderful, life-affirming choice in getting a toxic man out of her home and out of her life. She decided that the end of her marriage did not deserve a funeral. It deserved a party.

Traditionally, divorce has been seen as a loss. In fact, this view has become so prevalent that people who do not grieve are often accused of being in denial. But what about someone like Katie who is genuinely not sad? If you are one of these women - or men - you might want to consider marking your divorce by throwing yourself a divorce party.

Divorce Party Tip #1: Set the Right Mood

Tell the friends you invite upfront that this is going to be a celebration of the beginning of your life as a single person. Explain firmly that it is not going to be a pity party or a chance to rehash everything that went wrong in the marriage.

Divorce Party Tip #2: Avoid Inviting Close Mutual Friends

In most marriages, some people are closer to the wife, others are closer to the husband, and still others are close friends with both. People in the latter category may feel awkward and embarrassed about celebrating your divorce with you, especially if your spouse does not see the divorce as cause for celebration. Keep the guest list for the divorce party restricted to your close and personal friends.

Divorce Party Tip #3: Don't Taunt Your Spouse with the Party

Just because you feel the end of the marriage is cause for celebration doesn't mean your spouse feels the same way. If your spouse is grieving the divorce, there's no reason to kick him or her in the teeth with your newfound happiness. Remember that your life is taking a positive turn - you can afford to be discreet and gracious.

Divorce Party Tip #4: Look to the Future

The divorce party provides a great opportunity to talk with your friends about your life plans. Where do you want to be in five years? Have everyone write down five changes they would like to make in their lives and promise to meet again next year to see if everyone is on track. If your group enjoys a touch of the supernatural, why not hire a psychic to do readings, or buy a tarot deck and take turns doing readings for each other?

The end of a marriage doesn't have to be tragic. If you see it as a positive event, don't be shy about throwing yourself a divorce party to celebrate the new direction your life is taking.

Saturday 24 April 2010

The Story of Divorce Papers

The divorce papers can be a disturbing component of the divorce process, and because laws vary from state to state, the nature of the divorce papers can also change from state to state. In the United States, each state is permitted to create its own divorce laws. A different law in each state creates a variety of divorce papers in this country, depending on the area that you live in. This can make it confusing and overwhelming at times for those who are pursuing this avenue in dissolving their marriage.

The Lawyers

The basic fact is that most divorce papers are written by attorneys, and they represent their client’s perspective and how their client wants to dissolve the partnership. Fortunately, in most western societies, the act of determining the separation of assets, and support of any children involved, is removed from the parties themselves. Indeed, it is even removed from the lawyers in most cases. The judge overseeing the case is the final individual who will resolve the issues regarding the divorce as fairly and justly as possible.

One of the most important elements within divorce papers are those measures that protect the children or other descendents of the partnership that the divorce is dissolving. It is up to these specific divorce papers to state how these children will be cared for, supported, and provided every opportunity to make something of their lives. These papers will determine where the children will live and how much time they will spend with each of their parents.

Final Papers

The final divorce papers that are issued by the courts are known as the Decree Nisi Absolute in the United Kingdom. This symbolic piece of paper, the actual divorce decree, is paperwork that most people find they constantly need as they make major purchases and life decisions. Particularly, if you were to choose to enter into another legal marriage partnership, it is required in most western countries that you display evidence that you are single. Divorce papers then end up having a strangely important spot in a divorcee’s future life.

The final word on divorce papers must be on how they are delivered. In most states in this country, there is a delay from the final hearing to the issuing of the decree. It is somewhat disturbing to think that the final divorce papers are more often than not received in the mail. What an ignoble way to end partnerships and marriages that were entered into with love. The commitment of love and years together are now dissolved in a piece of mail. However, once that piece of paper is received, the divorce is finally complete, and both members of the former marriage can begin the process of moving forward with their lives.

Friday 23 April 2010

What To Look For in A Divorce lawyer

A divorce is something, for which people do not plan in advance, and the end result is often quite predictable which, because there has been no advance planning, and is without an aim, often causes people to see a dent being made in their wallets. You will definitely be one of the many that have to shell out money to pay the divorce lawyer, and who will lose your assets as well as face a number of other tricky situations.

Can Often Be A Less Than Satisfying Experience

To add insult to injury, dealing with a divorce lawyer can often be less than satisfying and gives occasion for many complaints arising. They could cause you to lose custody of the children, see money go out to pay for spouses that have successfully hidden their true worth, and you may have also spent considerable money without seeing any tangible results.

The divorce lawyer, who sees in this form of legal battle, a means to make some money, especially when one considers how popular and complex such cases are, treats divorce cases as a cash cow waiting to be milked. With costs of divorce being pretty unaffordable, many people may not even be able to afford the luxury of a divorce lawyer.

To really get the most out of your divorce lawyer, it is thus imperative that you spend some time planning the divorce case and it should be treated similar to how you planned your wedding. You should be able to clearly state to the divorce lawyer what your case is and what issues are involved. Most divorce lawyers appreciate brevity, and some may even charge an overly longwinded customer more.

The divorce lawyer that you hire should be a person that is clear in his or her thinking, and can strategize well as well as have enough time to spare for your case. It does not necessarily have to be a big and fancy firm, but should be one that fits your needs well. There is no doubt that entering into a divorce litigation will prove to be expensive as well as cause a great deal of emotional distress. You would thus be well advised to ascertain that the divorce lawyer that you hire has the requisite skill sets to win you your case.

The divorce lawyer should be more than a person that knows all the processes involved in divorce cases, and should be able to set goals and achieve them. Each action and play that he or she makes should be to achieve these goals rather than simply going through the different steps of the whole process of the divorce case. Being focused as well as objective, the divorce lawyer may thus further your goals and also prove to be cost effective.

The Basics of Divorce Laws

Divorce laws change by state in the United States and by country across the world. There are still several countries and parts of the world where the divorce laws are archaic, and in some areas the act is almost considered illegal. In the United States, each state has a separate chapter or title that is identified as the primary text for the divorce law. The basics of these laws are similar and include reference to basic parentage, visitation rights, custody criteria and the requirements for child support and property. Typically, all divorce laws in the United States have very specific grounds for divorce.

Origin

There are actually references to the dissolution of marriage in the bible, and some refer to the definition of a Jewish patriarchal family for the Jewish origin of divorce. But more importantly, why are there laws for this in the first place? The fact is, without divorce laws, human nature would take over and the result would be a complete breakdown in how two parties handle their mutual concerns and disagreements. In most western countries marriage is a legal contract and divorce is the annulment of that contract.

The phrase, “all is fair in love and war,” typifies how many people might react without divorce laws. Common sense or decency cannot always be guaranteed, which is why the divorce laws are in place to ensure that some basic human rights exist. Perhaps the most important aspect of divorce law is those components that protect the innocent children that are so often involved in this process. These children are entangled with the couple that is in the separation, due to the couple’s mutual commitments to one another. Divorce laws should ensure that these children get a fair shake in the process. It is a parent’s obligation to provide and care for their children, until those children reach the legal age of adulthood.

Extremes

In some countries, even well into the 20th century, divorce was only a right for the male in the marriage. In Uganda, it was not until 2004 that women were given equality under the divorce laws, and were allowed to divorce their husbands on the grounds of adultery. The previous laws in that country had supported a male’s right to do the same thing. Uganda typifies how divorce is viewed in Africa. Marriage is more of an ownership right for the male, than a partnership agreement. In many societies, divorce laws are not viewed as necessary to the rights of marriage, but are all based on this male ownership principle.

Thursday 22 April 2010

Divorce Law: Is No-fault Divorce Causing The High Rate Of Divorces In America?

Divorce means ending a marriage and is a difficult time in the life of every person affected by such a case. There is much emotional upheaval as well as the need to make tough decisions. Before proceeding further in your quest to end your marriage through divorce, it is necessary that you check out the divorce law pertaining to your state, as there are considerable differences from state to state.

Nearly Half of All American Marriages May End in Divorce

Americans are more and more often going in for divorce, and it is believed that as many as half of all Americans will have undergone a divorce to end their marriages. This makes it necessary for them to understand the divorce law completely. Knowing what is allowed and what is not in the divorce laws of the land is certainly very important if you wish to have any success in this matter. There are differences in divorce laws from state to state, which makes it necessary for you to determine what the exact laws are that affect your particular case.

The laws relating to divorce are also somewhat generalized across states. Nevertheless, two types of divorce are common and these are absolute and limited. The former instance of divorce means getting a judicial termination of the marriage because of occurrence of marital transgression, or another statutory reason that is ante the marriage ceremony. The end result, according to divorce law, is that after an absolute divorce, the parties regain their single status.

The divorce law relating to limited divorces result in different consequences that change from state to state though in the main, this form of divorce means obtaining a separation decree, and the parties are no longer able to have the right to cohabitate, even though the marriage has not been dissolved, and their status remains unchanged.

There is also a no-fault divorce statutes enacted in many states which means that the divorce law does not require either party to furnish proof that the divorcee has done something to cause the divorce to take place. It may be sufficient under this divorce law for the court to dissolve the marriage when it feels the marriage is no longer feasible. Such a divorce law has led to there being considerable debate whether such a divorce law is indeed the cause or effect of the higher number of divorces taking place in the United States.

Wednesday 21 April 2010

Divorce Grounds: Fault and No Fault

Divorce grounds are regulations set by each state that determines under what circumstances one party in a marriage can file for a dissolution of their marriage. There are two main types of divorce grounds; fault and no-fault.

A no-fault is the most common type of divorce grounds between the two. It does not require that either the husband or wife show fault, or that the spouse did something wrong for a divorce to be granted. It can be requested by either the husband or wife, despite objections by the spouse. It would be considered an “irreconcilable difference” if either the husband or wife did object, and would be justified divorce grounds for a no-fault divorce.

Various names given for divorce grounds in a no-fault, or legal terms for a couple not getting along are “incompatibility,” “irreconcilable differences,” or “irremediable breakdown of the marriage.” In some states, it is required that the couple not cohabitate for months or even years before a no-fault divorce is granted.

Divorce grounds established on fault, which means that the husband or wife showed wrongdoing on the part of the spouse can be sought in cases of:

Adultery
Cruelty or infliction of emotional or physical harm
Deserting the spouse for a length of time
Imprisonment for a number of years
Not disclosing, before marriage, the physical inability to have sexual intercourse

Divorce Grounds Differ in Various States

In 15 states, divorce grounds can only be sought as a no-fault divorce. The other states allow the spouse to file for either a fault divorce or a no-fault divorce. Reasons why a spouse may file for a fault rather than a no-fault divorce are:

Possibility of receiving a larger share of the marital property if wrongdoing is established
Possibility of receiving more alimony if wrongdoing is established
Not wanting to wait out the period of separation required by their state for a no-fault divorce

Although a spouse cannot prevent a no-fault divorce, it is possible to do so with a fault divorce by convincing the court that you are not guilty of wrongdoing. Rarely used defenses in a fault divorce are collusion, condonation, connivance, and provocation. Any defense used in a fault divorce grounds will eventually come to naught. Chances are that a court will eventually grant a divorce, due to strong public opinion against forcing a couple to remain married if one or both parties want out. It is also costly to forge a defense and money would be better spent on college funds for the children of the union than in fighting what will eventually be a losing battle.